at a Boulder smoothie shop, I stood in line behind a large quartz crystal. . . . the crystal spoke using only its mind. . . it ordered an acai bowl with hemp protein, cordyceps, and ashwagandha.

a mini-bar in Boulder. . . $12 gummy bears. . . an $18 oxygen boost. . . if you buy the stuffed prairie dog, you help relocate prairie-dog colonies displaced by front-range construction.

Maybe I can be one of those photographers who shoot photos of dark and ominous skies. I’ll become a storm chaser, seeking out swirling clouds and bursts of rain. I’ll sleep in my car, never change my clothes, and grow a long grizzled beard. I’ll sniff the ground and taste the wind. I’ll detect changes in air pressure, using only my mind. And when the lightening crashes and the thunder booms, I’ll appear out of nowhere, poof, and shoot an amazing photo. People will call me, the wizard.

Lousy photo of the Dushanbe Tea House. . . I was trying to capture both the ceiling and the carved pillars. Total fail. . . My caption for this photo: “Dude, there are no cheat codes for planet Earth.”

here’s proof that Boulder is a magical place. . . out of nowhere, a giant chocolate-covered almond appeared in my hands.

The largest unnatural arch in the world is inside the Denver REI flagship store. If you go, show up early. . . there’s only one good camping spot.